The ad below recently popped up on Craigslist Buffalo. We could easily assume it’s just a knockoff of the similar “safety not guaranteed” post that (rightfully) went viral years ago and even inspired a movie.
But let’s not.
Nobody has made a film about this one yet (In fairness, it’s only been 3 days.) but, congratulations, future (or past?!?) time traveler, it did find its way onto TB.
Let’s take this thing at face value and assess.
1. “Looking for time travel partner…for real”
Effective headline. You have absolutely captured my attention.
2. “need for a companion to have my back”
3. “all that read this think I am insane but I tell you that I am sane”
… is exactly what all of the crazy people say. When you’re crazy, you don’t seem crazy to yourself. You seem crazy to everyone else. That’s what crazy is.
4. “look to the improbable”
Like… Craigslist personal ads?
5. “I can’t offer much in re-numerations”
Gotta be honest… kinda saw this coming. You provide time travel, I provide companionship. Fair enough.
6. “to find the right candidate I need to hear your reason to travel back”
Now it sounds like you’re just looking for a pen pal to exchange fan fiction.
7. “Even if you don’t believe that this travel is possible”
Wait… what? Do YOU even believe it? You’re losing your audience, sir.
8. “I will respond to all candidates with kindness and will honor your reasons”
Yep. Pen pals.
9. “Offer is for serious applicants only”
What happened to number 7?
10. “Not looking for a romance relationship, kooks, hook ups, drugs or negativity”
Good. There are a lot of kooks out there, even in 2013, so be careful. That said, if the companion doesn’t work out, go back in time and pick a different one.