(Editor’s note: Mixed into a rambling narrative about the current state of affairs in the NFL loaded with historical and pop culture references, Mr. Brutal makes some football picks. Why…

warof1812(Editor’s note: Mixed into a rambling narrative about the current state of affairs in the NFL loaded with historical and pop culture references, Mr. Brutal makes some football picks. Why does he call it the “War of 1812 Football Prognostication”? He likes history, he’s Canadian, Bob Gaughan is American and includes his picks as well.)


MR. BRUTAL 29-47
BOB 26-34


BOB 7-8

Sunday, October 12, 2014
1:00 pm

Jacksonville @ TENNESSEE (-7.5)

Hurray! The FCC has finally repealed the archaic/arcane/asinine NFL blackout rule. This means that censorship of local home games that don’t sell out should be a thing of the past.

Not so fast, Lee Corso! NFL Commissioner Goodell says they are going to appeal and search other paths of inquiry to continue to legally “encourage” broadcasters to abide by the Byzantine system. Shut-ins, the elderly and people of a delicate constitution who live in Northern Florida should probably cheer for Goodell in this dispute.

Last week the Jaguars team was competitive with the Steelers and only trailed 10-9 in the fourth quarter till falling 17-9 in front of a 40% filled stadium that was at least 60% Steeler Nation yellow & black.

The biggest non-controversy was the Jaguar mascot Jaxson Deville improvising a new handwritten sign in the fourth quarter after being continually jeered and mocked by the numerous Steeler fans in attendance. Jaxson decided to address the Terrible Towel waving taunters with a sign that read “Towels carry Ebola.”

Immediately, the planet wobbled in its rotation, the twitter universe crackled with indignant outrage, the skies went dark, locusts descended upon EverBank Stadium, all the frogs left the St. John’s river and started hopping en masse toward the center of town and all the fans in attendance put their hands over their eyes and fretted

“What do we tell the children?”

Predictably, the Jaguars issued an apology right after the game explaining that the person who plays Jaxson Deville was a twenty year veteran of the job and should have known better, the sign was a spur of the moment decision undertaken by the mascot, not the team, and that they would certainly never do it again and were really, really, really, really sorry.

Tennessee is having a year of infamy. They are coming off a match where they blew a 28-3 lead against Cleveland and gave away the farm to the Browns who achieved a 29-28 victory and the biggest comeback by a road team in the history of the NFL. Their starting QB Jake Locker can’t play NFL quarterback effectively, and replacement Charlie Whitehurst can’t hold a four score lead or get a good haircut.

If the Jax Hot Tubs don’t get their first victory of the year on Sunday, they should at least achieve a cover.

Mr. Brutal: Jaguars (+7.5)
Bob: Jaguars +7.5

Baltimore (-3.5) @ TAMPA BAY 43.5

We expected a bit of a letdown from the Ravens in Indianapolis last week after WR Steve Smith’s personal grudge match victory over his previous employer, the Carolina Panthers, the previous week. The Ravens were flat on offense and the super-satisfied Joe “The Counting Machine” Flacco looked as complacent and underachieving as he did last year after receiving his massive contract that is a ball and chain around the Raven’s salary cap flexibility.

Lovie Smith is feeling good after stealing that victory from the old and creaky Pittsburgh Steeler defense two weeks ago and barely losing in overtime last week against the heavily-favored Saints. Of course part of the reason the Bucs are playing better is the quarterback situation. Due to injury to Lovie’s choice to pilot the team for the season– mediocre veteran Josh McCown– his hand was forced to start “Steve Grogan Neck on Steroids” sophomore Mike Glennon who clearly should have been the starter.

Tampa could win this outright, and the Ravens are a question mark on the road.

Mr. Brutal: BUCCANEERS (+3.5)
Bob: Ravens -3.5

Denver (-10.5) @ NEW YORK JETS 48

Denver muted the Cardinals 41-20 last week. Peyton Android and his horde of Daleks and Cybermen receiving targets had a thirteen day break to lick their wounds from the OT loss in Seattle and perfect their craft of moving up & down the grid iron and eventually taking over the planet.

However, this is the site of Peyton Gort’s worst loss in history in last year’s Super Bowl. The weather may also play a roll, the Jets’ fans will be loud/angry/impolite and insensitive to the maximum and Rex can summon up one last great stand from his defense as long as Geno doesn’t play really poorly. (This could all plausibly happen except for the last one.)

Somehow, someway the Turbines stay in this one and bounce back, because they can’t be as bad as they were in that 31-0 shut out last week in San Diego.

Mr. Brutal: JETS (+10.5)
Bob: JETS +10.5

Detroit (-2) @ MINNESOTA 44

Our team of Destiny, the Lions may be cursed.

Several atypical injuries may help the Vikings on Sunday. Lions LB Steve Tulloch is out with Bill Gramatica injury, hurt while celebrating a routine sack in the game against the Jets. TE Joseph Fauria is out in a bizarre accident. He was hurt severely while trying to potty train his demonically possessed puppy Cujo. QB Matt Stafford was late to practice two weeks ago and almost worse due to a huge traffic jam from a collapsed freeway overpass, a shock in a city with well maintained infrastructure like Detroit.

This all follows last year’s bizarre accident where starting Lions’ wide receiver Nate Burleson sustained a season/career-threatening injury after trying to stop a pizza from sliding off the empty passenger seat in a car he was driving.

The Vikings lost badly last Thursday in Green Bay when “The Magic Christian” Ponder failed to lead the Horned Heads to victory or over midfield in the 42-10 disaster against the Packers. Minnesota is praying that Teddy Bridgewater will be healthy enough to start and play effectively.

This is because people associate Christian Ponder with quarterbacking ability the same as they associate the movie “Fargo” with automatic wood-chippers.

Mr. Brutal: Lions (-2)
Bob: Lions -2

New England (-3) @ BUFFALO 45

Jeezzz… before last week’s game with the Lions we were worried that this QB switch for the Bills wouldn’t work out. Kyle Orton? does he even want to play football? The Cowboys had to bribe him into returning and the Bills signed him with a similar ploy when they saw after the preseason that the collective ability of Manuel, Tuel and Lewis didn’t even add up to that of former Bills fill-in Billy Joe Hobert.

This was chilling, since Billy Jo Gun Rack admitted after a poor relief stint years ago that he really hadn’t even read the Bills’ playbook.

But all the Bills needed was a veteran presence to improve the offence and the morale of the entire team. We loved them last week because our “Team of Destiny,” the Detroit Lions had all of their weapons banged up and that Orton would provide a booster shot of competence. This week they have hated rivals the Patriots coming into the Ralph after their bum’s rushing of the Bengals on Sunday night.

The Patriots rose from the ashes like a Phoenix, after the stinging bonfire of criticism from the experts, fans and haters. For one game they looked like the old Patriots, and their fearless leader Lazarus Brady quieted the blogger hyenas for the time being.

But we don’t see them waltzing into Buffalo and beating the Bills. There is bound to be an emotional letdown after a game like Sunday Night’s– all the shortfalls of the Patriots didn’t just vanish with that single win. The slightly shorter week of preparation against a Bills’ team that is reborn will be a much tougher challenge.

The Bills will be home playing in front of the most dedicated fans in the NFL. The new ownership of the Buffalo Bills was made official this week with the unanimous approval of the NFL Board of Governors. The fans are juiced up, and Patriot QB Tom Bundchen will still have to overcome arthritis, adrenaline and testosterone depletion and the Buffalo defensive front.

(You also have to admire Orton all the more, because he seemed to fleece Jerry Jones for a huge chunk of money during some contract shenanigans in Big “D” and while in Denver he vehemently resented the Saint Tebow Canonization.)

Mr. Brutal: BILLS (+3)
Bob: BILLS +3

Carolina @ CINCINNATI (-6.5) 45

Carolina overpowered the hibernating Bears last week in the second half and pulled out a hard fought victory in a tiring effort.

However, they have zero chance in this game because the Bengals exerted negligible energy and almost zero calories in last Sunday night’s laugher loss in New England. It was obvious from the outset the Cincinnati plan was to extend their bye week by another seven days by laying down, rolling over and purring as the Patriots scratched their bellies.

So the Bengals are well rested and their injured players who were held out of last week’s loss for safekeeping will all be back in the lineup. Marvin Lewis actually showed some anger at the team this week and amped up the practice tempo. This resulted in A.J. Green getting hurt by aggravating his ankle injury and he will be out.

But the Bengals have not lost a regular season home game since 2012 and the Tigers appear surly and anxious. The defense is impatient to show that their impotent effort last Sunday Night was an anomaly, and Archie Andrews Dalton never lets a bad loss affect him the next game. (This is great except for the fact that it doesn’t matter when most of your worst games are playoff elimination games.)

Bengal Tigers are much larger, stronger, fiercer and bolder than Panthers who are really just a black variety of leopards who prefer nocturnal roamings… and this is a day game. (I know this because I have actually worked with them.)

The Panthers will also be further hampered by suspensions. For the second game they will be without defensive end Frank Alexander who has been suspended for 10 games for violating the league’s substance abuse policy. Obviously another victim mistakenly taking the female fertility drug Human Chorionic Gonadotropin thinking it was Aleve.

Bengals bounce back with a vengeance.

Mr. Brutal: BENGALS (-6.5)
Bob: Panthers +6.5

Pittsburgh @ CLEVELAND (-2.5) 47

Still no word on when or whether federal indictments are coming down on Browns owner Jimmy Haslam. Still no word on whether Cleveland will add any plays to the “Manziel Package” other than the sophomoric illegal “sideline conversation with the coach, tell me when to run the length of the sandlot” play that was flagged for being illegal, ill conceived and embarrassing three weeks ago.

Brian Hoyer, is now 5-2 as a Browns’ starter. Cleveland is at home, coming off the biggest comeback by a road team in history. Roethlisberger did enough last week to beat the Hot Tubs in Jacksonville, but the Steelers could only score 17 points to win by a single score over the worst team in the League.

Cleveland gets the edge in what should be a classic Brian Sipe-Terry Bradshaw, Dog Pound vs. Gerela’s Gorillas AFC Central slobber-knocker.

Brutal: CLEVELAND -2.5

Green Bay (-3.5) @ MIAMI 49.5

The Packers are getting in sync and playboy Aaron Rodgers is living the “Life of Riley”– ten days off after an easy victory over a division rival and then a vacation trip to South Beach.

The Dolphins have enjoyed two weeks off after getting Raider Head Coach Dennis Allen fired after the London Massacre.

We think that this could be closer than expected and the Dolphins cover.


  1. We don’t know if the Italian National Soccer Team dictum of no copulation before games is effective.
  2. There are rumors that Aaron’s girlfriend is making the trip to Miami to meet up with him. We realize this is probably only a Packer team-sanctioned side-trip to visit flea markets and do some serious antiquing. But on the off chance it isn’t and the paisans are correct…

Mr. Brutal: DOLPHINS (+3.5)
Bob: DOLPHINS +3.5

4:05 pm

San Diego (-7.5) @ OAKLAND 43.5

The Chargers are rolling, their local economy is above the national average and real estate values are solid. The only bad things about San Diego are the moribund Padres and the ongoing civil lawsuits and embarrassing legacy of their touchy-feely obsessed ex-mayor Bob Filner.

Philip Rivers and the Chargers should probably have gotten more respect last week against the Jets and a bigger line than -7, but Vegas and the east coast handle tend to gravitate to propping up the Jets and Giants no matter how poor they are playing.

This week they are only 7.5 point favorites in Oakland.

Nothing new to report with the Raiders, other than:

  • losing by a 100 points to the Dolphins in England two weeks ago
  • the firing of their 30th Head coach in 15 years
  • the hiring of Miami head coach retread Tony Sparano since Raider management believes after getting wiped out by the Dolphins that Miami might be on to something, so “let’s hire anyone associated with that team”
  • reports that Raider owner Mark Davis is offering ridiculous salary figures and incentives to MNF analyst Jon Gruden to become the Raiders next Head Coach

Davis is proving as obsessed of purpose as his late father and even gave himself a homemade cereal bowl haircut to emulate Gruden, but with disastrous “Dutchboy on Bad Dope” results.

Temp coach Tony Sparano announced at his inaugural press conference that he intends to win games, keep the job permanently and that he resents continual mafia inferences and constantly being called Tony Soprano by the media.

He then did more to distance himself from that stereotype and parody by ceremonially giving a mob burial to a football at Raider practice. Saying it represented the first four games of the season, he then invited(? insisted?) each player throw a shovel full of dirt on its grave.

The association was further compounded and affirmed when he held a mandatory team meeting to watch an inspirational film. The selection was the infamous “Big Pussy Bonpensiero Sleeps with the Fishes” episode of a television series that Tony Sparano wishes to remain nameless.

Raiders find the inspiration to cover this spread and avoid unscheduled yacht cruises on the San Francisco Bay.

Mr. Brutal: RAIDERS (+8)
Bob: San Dielgo -8

4:25 pm

Chicago @ ATLANTA (-3) 54

The competitive image of Chicago QB Jay Cutler isn’t helped much when you see him in the middle of a blowout two weeks ago laughing and backslapping with opposing quarterback Aaron Rodgers of the Packers. During the 38-17 whitewash of Chicago by Green Bay and with an injured player down on the field of play for an extended time, Jay and Aaron were having a lengthy jovial exchange.

Then people noticed that during the game Aaron Rodgers was giving hand signal audibles to his wide receivers that looked like he was trying to smoke a small roach from an even smaller roach clip. When asked about it during the week, Rodgers explained it had no relationship to drug use and was a a tribute to his buddy Jay and a web site that features various photo-shopped poses of Cutler smoking cigarettes.

Hmmmm, maybe, but watching these two interact,  the obvious Bromance between the two bon vivants– the carousing female companion history of the now married Cutler and the present relationship status of Aaron Rodgers and sexpot Olivia Munn– well, many Bears and Packers fans are speculating that the two rival team leaders are less concerned with beating each others’ teams and more concerned with planning a chummy upcoming get-together.

Something along the lines of a Volchek-Cochran and spouses type “Scrabble Night” encounter as seen on Ray Donovan.

Last week the Bears went into Carolina and pretty much led the entire game till there were four minutes left to go and Cutler coughed up the key fumble that led to the Panthers winning. The cumulative hits on Cutler and the Bears’ defense that fades from permanent pigment to invisible ink by the fourth quarter were behind the deterioration.

The Bears are gripping.

Atlanta had so many injuries to their offensive line two weeks ago in Minnesota that they actually had tight ends playing tackle in the third quarter. Last week they proved they can’t hold a lead or win on the road when they were bean-stalked by the resurging Giants in New York.

But this is a revenge game for wide receiver, punt returner, kick returner and guided missile Devin Hester against his former Bears’ team who misused his talents over the years and then didn’t resign him. He has already broken the all-time TD return record in Atlanta this year and {drum roll} is looking for more and loaded for Bear. { rim shot }

The Falcons love playing at home in their ear-splitting decibel dome and need a win in the very mediocre and still winnable NFC South. They arguably have the most dangerous group of pass catchers in the league

On the fast turf, the aforementioned Devin Hester, Julio Jones, Roddy White, Eric Weems, Harry Douglas, Bear Pascoe, Freddy Fender Martino, Jacquizz Rodgers, Stephen Jackson and the aura/legacy of Tony Gonzalez, Alfred Jenkins and Billy “White Shoes” Johnson make Atlanta “Pass Catcher Central.”

The only distraction might be if super ego “Peon Deion” Sanders shows up again to congratulate Hester for adding another return touchdown beyond Deion’s record. He might either try to sign Devin in the end zone as a client in his cockamamie quasi-management agency… or serve Hester a subpoena for copyright infringement after doing the patented Sanders high step into the end zone again without written permission.

Mr. Brutal: FALCONS (-3)
Bob: Bears +3

Dallas @ SEATTLE (-8.5) 47.5

Cowboys owner Jerry Jones has looked like a cackling gargoyle perched up in his opulent private box the last two weeks in Dallas. The Sunday night 38-17 revenge win over the Saints two weeks ago and the hard fought 20-17 “Traitor Bowl” win against the Houston Texans on Sunday have made him even giddier than he appears in those numerous artistic boudoir and bathroom photos of him and his multiple “nieces” that have flooded the internet.

Notwithstanding, everything is not coming up yellow roses in big “D.” Uber-capitalist Jerry is disgusted with the horde of Cowboy season ticket holders who have enthusiastically embraced the same economic philosophy that he worships, and are selling off their ducats to fans of the visiting teams at a tidy profit.

The last straw was Sunday when the din was so loud in the Glass Cathedral that Cowboy quarterback Tony Romo had to resort to the Harpo Marx snap count every time Dallas had the ball.

This should be good practice for this game, because the “Twelfth Man” in Seattle will be out to regain their title as loudest stadium in the known universe after losing the honor two weeks ago to the Kansas City Chiefs and their rabid rabble of rowdies who boisterously encouraged the red and yellow on in their signature stomping of the Patriots.

Seattle is coming off a short week after their muzzled 27-17 victory on Monday over the Washington “Proof of Native American Murder Souvenirs” in Maryland.

Hmmmmm, the referees called back three touchdowns by Percy Harvin of the Seahawks, simultaneously keeping the game close, competitive and controversial. People with Harvin on their fantasy teams and bettors who took the “over” were even more upset than Seahawk CB Richard Sherman and All-Pro safety Earl Thomas who openly questioned the integrity of the NFL and their on-the-field officials.

“Where’s Waldo” league boss Roger Goodell has yet to weigh in on the issue and levy his typical maximum fines to mute free speech as per normal regarding any critique voiced by players that counters the unassailable vestal virgin integrity of the NFL.

The late flags thrown against the Seahawks on Monday and the recent rule changes that target cornerbacks breathing too rapidly on wide receivers have combined to make Seattle feel the league is going out of their way to mute their signature strengths. Obviously, the Shield wants a team with more widespread “appeal” to win this year.

Nothing could satisfy the Super Bowl Champions more than performing ruthless vivisection on “America’s Team” this Sunday when they wander into the sacrificial altar of CenturyLink Field. This game could get ugly. Hopefully Tony Romo’s multiple surgical repairs will endure the beat-down he is about to receive.

Mr. Brutal: SEAHAWKS (-8.5)
Bob: SEAHAWKS -8.5

Washington @ ARIZONA (-3)

Another tough couple of weeks for the beleaguered Washington football franchise, its fans and owner “Diminutive Danny Snyder.” It wasn’t bad enough that the “Proof of Native American Bounties” got flattened at home two weeks back in a Thursday Night 45-14 kick in the groin by the NFC East rival Giants, resurrecting their foundering division title hopes.

Then they got beaten again Monday 27-17 by the Super Bowl Champ Seahawks in a game that was nowhere near as close as the score. With THREE(!) Percy Harvin Touchdowns called back by dubious penalties, the NFL did all it could to help Washington stay in this contest. Despite this, the strict enforcement of the new anti-corner back rules and the surprise employment of special guest Line Judge Tim Donaghy, the Seahawks endured and beat Washington.

Now the Federal Communications Commission has waded in and threatened to fine broadcasters for using the graphic, gory, racist and historically embarrassing Washington nickname. This follows the Federal Trade Commission revoking pompous boy’s copyright protection on his franchise name several weeks ago.

At this rate, in the next several weeks the football team will be declared a contagious hazard on a par with Ebola by the Center for Disease Control in Atlanta. Then a federal order will follow to quarantine all people connected with the team inside Shah Snyder’s mansion and compound in nearby Virginia. This is possible because it has better security than the White House. This is due to higher fences than 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and a 24 hour security detail courtesy of Cliven Bundy ranch-trained militiamen who shoot at anything that moves, unlike pussy Secret Service guards.

All of this bad publicity is causing Daniel Snyder money. The only thing that bothers him more are non hypo-allergenic foot lifts in his custom Italian leather shoes.

Soon Roger Goodell will have to act since public opinion and events are getting ahead of him yet once again on an issue that he doesn’t want to deal with. At some point Danny SNIDEr will give up the team name fight in exchange for concessions in some form, hopefully incentives to build yet another new stadium. He has already solicited proposals from Maryland, Virginia and the District of Columbia, pitting them all against each other in a typical ploy of semi-legalized extortion practiced by sports team owners everywhere.

All of this is being pursued because FedEx Field in nearby Maryland is pathetically ancient (built all the way back in the last century circa 1997) and it is “so last decade” inadequate to maximize revenue growth.

Part of the reason the stadium is “inadequate” and rated the “worst fan experience” venue in the NFL is that the fans all hate the changes the Little Dictator made to the place through unconstrained stomach turning greed. Raising ticket, concession, personal seat license and parking rates above the NFL norm, closing entrances into the stadium, charging extra fees to access parts of the stadium, obscured view “premium” seats, etc.

Of course the biggest problem is that the Washington “Blood Money Rewards” are a terrible football team. Automatic sell outs, bloated price merchandise windfalls and masochistic fans willing to shell out coercion cash at the drop of a hat may be a thing of the past.

Arizona is licking their wounds after their worst game of the season last week in Denver. What better prescription for the red birds than going home and facing the “Dysfunctional Politically Incorrects” in the deafening University of Phoenix semi-dome?

Mr. Brutal: CARDINALS (-3)


8:30 pm

New York Giants @ PHILADELPHIA (-2.5) 50.5

New York head coach Tom Coughlin has a knack for turning the Giants around just when it appears the car has driven into the ditch of no return and the players can no longer stand him.

Eagles’ head coach Chip Kelly was inspired by a distant relative of college football legend Fielding H. Yost this past week. Always an innovator, Chip observed Ned Yost’s unorthodox management style of the Kansas City Royals in several victories last week that put the Royals into the American League Championship Series. Chip has brought in a “bunt & steal” coach to teach his offense new movement techniques to employ in pre-snap motions to discombobulate the opposition.

The Eagles are a conundrum. They barely beat Saint Louis last week 34-28 after blowing a 34-7 lead. If it wasn’t for special teams and Ram turnovers the Eagles don’t win this game. Nick Foles only averaged 5.6 yards per completion, 24-37 for only 207 yards, 2 TD’s, 1 Int. The Eagle rushing game is suffering because RB LeSean “Shady” McCoy is having a stealth season where he continues to deliberately under-perform and ask to take himself out of games in crucial situations.

This is either because he really hates fantasy football (where he was ranked #1 in many leagues pre-season ) or it is part of Chip Kelly’s master “Operation Killdeer” plan that simultaneously saves LeSean’s body for the stretch drive, convinces the opposition that he doesn’t merit attention because he is washed up, and also confirms the appropriateness of his nickname.

We are torn here. We can’t cheer for Nick Foles to continue to flounder, that might mean the “Walking Human Hand Grenade” Mark Sanchez will come into the game and set the cause of quality quarterbacking back half a century. On the other hand, our wild pre-season prediction that practice squad standout, G.J. Kinnie piloting the Eagle offense is one step closer to reality.

Eagles somehow win and cover in another unorthodox victory.

Mr. Brutal: EAGLES (-2.5)
Bob: Giants +2.5

Monday, October 13, 2014
8:30 pm

San Francisco (-3.5) @ SAINT LOUIS 44

Rams HC Jeff Fisher was coming off a bye last week, and still didn’t want to commit to a starting quarterback. Southern Mississippi grad Austin Davis had played really well since franchise QB and china doll Sam Bradford went down yet again for an extended stay on the IR at the beginning of the year.

But the always overrated Fisher had decided to keep the young signal caller hungry, nervous and on tender hooks, so he continued to muse about starting veteran Shaun Hill. Maybe Jeff was a big Brett Favre fan, and resented Davis breaking most of his records at Southern Mississippi or maybe he just can’t help himself in that he just doesn’t understand offense and won’t leave the major decisions in the hands of competent professionals.

If he is ever going to use Shaun Hill, maybe he can call up Mike Martz and beg him out of retirement to coordinate the offense. Hill had his best year and most progress when Martz was his coordinator in San Francisco. This is highly unlikely for many reasons. Having an ex-Rams head coach on the staff who is clearly more intelligent would pose a threat to Fisher’s massive yet fragile ego and his bloated reputation.

Like fellow “defense first” specialists Rex Ryan and Lovie Smith, he tends to foster under-performing attacks for the most part because he drafts players with a “defense first, second and third” philosophy and is resistant to any change in the offensive approach to football that isn’t derived from the fundamental foundations laid out by Amos Alonzo Stagg, Walter Camp or Fielding H. Yost.

Jeff Fisher was one of the few people who applauded Arkansas head coach & fellow Flintstone brain Brett Bielema in his game with Texas A&M two weeks ago. Invoking the spirit of Admiral Farragut at the “Battle of Mobile Bay” and needing a touchdown, Brett proudly called FOUR straight running plays between the tackles in overtime to lose a winnable game to the favored Aggies in Texas. Way to go, Brett!!! You managed to pull the almost impossible feat of losing in an anticlimactic, predictable and spectacular fashion simultaneously.

Now this week, Fisher announces that Austin Davis is the starter until the end of the year. This was unavoidable since Davis yet again put up great numbers (29/49, 375 yards, 3TD’s, 0 INT) in a noble near-loss to the elusive Darren Sproles, the stuck-in-a-rut mediocre Nick Foles and the Philadelphia Eagles.

The 49ers gossip over the future of Active-Volcano-Status- Def-Con Four Head Coach Jim Harbaugh just won’t go away.

The latest rumor has him crossing the Bay Bridge to Oaktown and becoming the Ringmaster-General-Zookeeper of the Raiders. This has followed previous reports that he would return to his alma mater, the University of Michigan to rescue that sinking anvil and vague rumblings that he would throw his current stressful western civilization-influenced lifestyle away, and accept a five-year contract as commissioner of the Northern Territory Australian Rules Football League.

This is the biggest game of the year for the Rams. They are usually competitive and if their defense plays up to form, the improving offense under Davis should be able to keep this close and probably win it.

Mr. Brutal: RAMS (+3.5)
Bob: RAMS +3.5

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